So as most of you know, I am currently training to run a marathon. My friend Alison (who has run several previous marathons and is just generally an all-around bad ass) qualified to run Boston this year, and since that race is in April, she is in the throws of training for that. Like the sucker I am (and possibly because I was asked after consuming too many glasses of wine) I agreed to join her in the training for this race. I do not plan to run a marathon in April. I'm shooting more for, say, October. Because why not extend the torture throughout the year, right? And I'm nothing if not an excellent procrastinator.
At any rate, despite my eternal cynicism, the training is going quite well. The past three weekends we have run 15, 17, and 18-mile runs and I have not self-combusted into a pile of sweaty spandex. Yet. The 18-miler almost did me in, but I'm trying to take what I learned from that run and apply it to my relatively sparse wealth of knowledge on long-distance running. Here are a few things I've learned so far:
1. 15, 17, and 18 mile runs are extremely taxing on a mommy bladder. Running for three hours with no potty break? Ain't gonna happen. But the dirt backroads we run on have a surprising lack of port-o-potties (must write to city council on that one) or public restrooms. Luckily, the so-called "runners high" of endorphins also lessens any modesty issues you might have with squatting on the side of the road.
2. Regardless of what you wear on a long run, be it high-tech, moisture-wicking, flat-seamed running apparel or your favorite flannel pjs (speaking from experience, I do not recommend the latter), at some point, there's gonna be chafing. It's then you realize that maybe those runners with the band-aids over their nipples and stash of vaseline in their fuel belt aren't deviant pervs after all, they're just trying to protect their poor skin.
3. At some point during a long run, you will feel the overwhelming urge to cry like a baby. On our last run, I held off until I was home, where I collapsed face-down on the living room rug and sobbed uncontrollably for about 10 minutes. I'm not exactly sure what to attribute the emotional outburst to, but I'm guessing it was (a). sheer physical exhaustion; (b). the realization while lying on the floor that there is a startling amount of food particles and dust bunnies under my sofa and this must mean I'm horrible housekeeper (and I think I should feel bad about this, right?) or (c). the fact that three of my ten toenails have declared mutiny, are turning black and threatening to fall off one week before I have to attend an event to which I will likely be wearing open-toed shoes (see post below.)
I'm sure this new-found knowledge I'm sharing today is making you all want to become runners, right?! Ha! Nope, it's not a pretty sport, but right now there's one thing motivating me to continue: the promise that once I've done a 20-mile run, I can purchase these babies:
I know, I know - it's not as much fun as purchasing uber-girly platform heels, but c'mon, people - they're day-glo PINK! The 11-year old me is screaming excitedly while jumping up & down in her black lace leggings and gummi bracelets! Besides, I've got to find little things to keep me motivated... I've got seven more months of this torture ahead! :) Happy Monday!
